Laboring, Concentrating, at home!
Spencer suiting up to "catch" the baby!
Right after birth
First Family of 4 Picture!
I am always interested in hearing birth stories and the different journeys all women take in their amazing experience. So here is my birth story, sorry it took 2 months! This labor and delivery experience went exactly how I wanted it to go, I loved it! The story is very long, of course, even after trying to condense it from 6 pages, I only got it to 5! Read it, skim it, skip it, whatever your interest level is. Enjoy my birthing journey!
Friday, October 21, 2011, my “due date” I started having some very light contractions, just one here and there. I went in for my appointment that morning, and the Dr. checked me. I was thinned 75% and opened still only to a 3, same as last week. He said he thinks I have at least 1 more week to go! He was going out of town for a week, but we shouldn’t worry since I probably have the time…
I thought otherwise. I thought my baby may come that night, or the next day, especially if it was going to be anything like the first baby, where the day my contractions started was the day I was going to start laboring.
Spencer had a tee time with his dad that afternoon. I needed to go to Costco sometime in the next couple weeks, but had planned to go that weekend if there was time. I, being a little superstitious, made it to Costco. The day of labor with Allstar, Spencer & I went to the driving range where he hit a bucket of balls, then we went to Costco…So this day, since Spencer was playing golf I wanted to go to Costco! Maybe that is the trick for our babies!
[Allstar's birth story] My mom and I also went to JoAnn’s Fabrics to get me some fabric for some projects for the next week. I had told my mom the doc said we probably had a week, so she suggested we go get some fabric for some projects, to keep me busy with something I enjoy doing to help pass the time of waiting.
I went to the bathroom that afternoon and noticed the little mucous plug in the toilet! Yea! After reading up about it again, it confirmed that losing the mucous plug means labor is soon, but that could mean 1 day or it could mean 1 week! I needed to see the bloody show for it to be within 48 hours. I will keep waiting and watching, but there was hope!
I didn’t want the pregnancy to be over with because I was uncomfortable and tired and just done with being pregnant. I love being pregnant, I actually feel more comfortable about myself. I am very healthy and well feeling. I just wanted to meet our sweet little baby…boy or girl?!!
We went to bed that night, contractions had not gotten any stronger or more frequent, but I still just had this feeling that I was going to experience birthing again, and we were going to get to meet our baby really soon.
Saturday, October 22, 2011 I woke up at my usual 4:00 a.m. potty time. I felt pretty uncomfortable, and then a contraction, a bit stronger, like it was meaning something. After wiping I noticed there was a bit more mucous. I sat back in the bed and laid down and felt something. Something sticky and wet. I didn’t think a whole lot of it, since there is stuff, especially near the end, and I wanted to go back to sleep. About 4:45 a.m. I had another contraction that stirred me. At 5:00 a.m. I decided to go back to the bathroom because there was a lot of sticky wetness and I needed to wipe it up. There was the rest of my mucous plug! Lots of it, and the little bloody show as well! I laid back down in bed and felt a couple stronger contractions, 10-20 minutes a part. I knew today was the day!!!!! I fell asleep between a couple, but then started to battle with myself. I wanted to take a shower, but did I really want to get up that early or try to sleep it out and shower in a couple hours? By 5:45 a.m. I was feeling the contractions like 6-10 minutes a part. I decided to get up and shower, I felt the time was going to be sooner than later and if I wanted to wash my hair I had to get up. I had just downloaded an app on my phone for timing contractions. Last minute before I went into the bathroom I decided to grab my phone so I could figure out how the timer worked, and wanted to see if it made any noise so I could lay back down in bed while Spencer was still sleeping and time them. As I was going to the bathroom, yet again, I started timing them and they were consistently 4-5 minutes a part. I read that was in active labor for sure! After 20 minutes I got in the shower. They kept coming. Why had Spencer not gotten up and asked what I was doing? I brushed my hair out and went to wake Spencer, to tell him we needed to maybe call his mom and let her know she needs to get ready so she can come and get Allstar the moment we tell her. He asked if I was sure and I told him the timing and what I was feeling. He immediately got up. We decided to wait until 7:00 a.m. to call Jeri. Spencer got in the shower, I told him to be quick so he could take care of Allstar. It seemed like a long 30 minutes waiting for Jeri to come pick up Allstar. I love my sweet little boy, but going through contractions is not easy with distractions, even if they are good distractions! He just wanted to hang around me, but I had to ignore him as much as I could and ride through the contractions when they came, which was frequent, every 3-4 minutes. I was relieved when she got there at 7:30 a.m., but had many mixed feelings as well, knowing I had to say goodbye to my sweet boy for the last time with just the two of us. I had thought about this moment many times before, knowing it would be hard to say goodbye. I held him and hugged him for a minute telling him how much I loved him. I cried as soon as Spencer took him away. I hoped he knew how much I love him, no matter what. I hoped he knew how much I still care about him, even though I was bringing another baby home that would take some of my attention away from him. [This is the 2nd time I have written this part and I am still crying about it when I think about that moment!]
It took me a couple hours to finally get ready after the shower, in between waiting out the contractions and Allstar it just took some time. I wanted to eat something for breakfast, knowing I wouldn’t get to eat much later in labor, so Spencer brought me some toast, milk and a banana. I got 1 piece of toast down me, the milk, and throughout an hour got the banana down me. I turned on my soundtrack “Sleepy Sounds” which has relaxation music that I listened to during the last couple months of pregnancy to help relax. I had Spencer call my mom and tell her that I was in labor and that we would call her when I got checked at the hospital to give her the heads up on when to expect to come. We told her we’d probably be going that morning sometime. I wanted her to be there for a little support, but mostly to capture the birth of this baby with pictures and video. I wanted to get the video of Spencer announcing the gender of the baby, and receiving/catching the baby if he ended up feeling up to it at that moment. By 8:00 a.m. when I was ready, I put a shirt on and walked around the room for half hour. Holding my belly a little and just breathing through the contractions. I had been up for 3 hours, standing up for most of it. I was getting tired, and needed to sit down. After various positions and time I decided to move to the bed, to see if I could fall asleep a little in between contractions. Spencer helped me into bed, and situated the body pillow in between my legs. I was SO comfortable! Surprisingly I was able to relax enough in between the contractions to go into a deep sleep for a minute before they came again. It was around 8:45 a.m. by now. My contractions we getting harder, I could feel it was getting closer to the end, at least I thought. I was really trying to think back to my labor with Allstar, trying to find the similarities. I wanted to labor at home as long as I could this time, thinking I could be more relaxed and focused. I wanted to be strong. It’s just so hard to know. I was really trying to be in tune to my body. I had a couple longer, harder contractions. I mentioned to Spencer at 9:15 a.m. I think it may be time to go to the hospital. They were getting to the point that if they got any harder I would be too stubborn to get up out of bed and go! He asked if I was sure and suggested we wait just a little longer. He started timing my contractions again to see how far apart they were and how long they were lasting. We had a system down where I would tap my finger when it started and again when it stopped. So we waited. I had a contraction, then two more that lasted over a minute and were like two minutes apart. I was really feeling them, and getting a slight feeling of wanting to push soon. I really felt the time was coming! Spencer saw it too, after those long hard contractions. He said, ok we should go now! He loaded the car with the body pillow and a few last minute packing things then came to get me. I took a good 10 minutes to get me to the car. We are so grateful to live just right behind the hospital. We drove the couple minutes and were there!
So we ended up checking into the hospital around 9:45 a.m. On the way up the elevator I looked at Spencer and said “I hope I am at least a 6 [dilated].” In my head I was thinking a 7, but thought it’s better to vocally guess lower than higher, less disappointment. He said “I hope you are at least a 5!” [I checked in at a 4 last time] I stood at the check-in desk with my hands on the counter and my head down, just concentrating on going through the contractions. I was bugged at the little questions they had to ask us to get checked in. Spencer, when under any kind of pressure always gets my birthday wrong! So I had to take a little energy and correct him. I was especially annoyed when Spencer asked the receptionist if there were any nurses who were more for natural birth that could help us, and she replied “Oh, cause you are trying to go natural... Trying? No, we are going natural! We finally got taken to our room. The nurse asked me to change into the gown and go to the bathroom to give them a urine sample. It took me like 15 minutes to do this. When I am going through my contractions I just have to get in my own little zone, and really tune out anything going on around me as much as I can. This really comes off as me not being very nice, but a bit stubborn, unfortunately. We asked her if she had experience with natural birth and part of her response was something like “you are trying to go natural?” Again with the trying! We informed her that this was our second birth, and the first one came natural, and un-medicated. We really wanted a nurse who was supportive of natural births, because they seem to be more helpful and sympathetic to our desire to go un-medicated. Anyway, the nurse had me lay on the bed and it was time…time to see how I did, time to see how strong I was, time to see if I lasted longer at home, and to see if I was able to be strong. How dilated was I?...The nurse checked me, it seemed like she was taking and feeling longer than needed. Uh oh, I thought, this can’t be good, she is trying to give me some number. [Remember the day before I was only at a 3.] She finally announced, you are 85% effaced and at a 7. YEAH!!!!!!! Both Spencer and I smiled and were SO happy! We let out a sigh of relief and said we were so happy. She said “I am glad I could give you that present!” It definitely was. I was so happy, so grateful for my body and truly amazed at how quickly it was progressing! I can do this! We are going to have a baby sooner than later! I just have to keep my body going!
My doctor had just left out of town that morning, which I knew. So the on call doctor for that day came in and introduced herself and see how I was doing, check all the charts and graphs and heartbeat. She stated she knew we were planning an un-medicated birth. We told her that Spencer would like to receive the baby, and she was just ok with that. I remembered about not wanting pitocin after birth, that we had spoken with our Dr. about this and he had agreed to wait 5 minutes after the placenta was delivered to give my body the chance to contract and stop the bleeding itself. The on call Dr. would not even give me that option. She said there is no way, and that I would be given the pitocin, and did not leave it open to discussion. I was very annoyed and put out by that, but knew it was a battle I didn’t want to fight at that time; I had to focus on my contractions and keeping my body calm so I could get this baby here how I wanted to. I could be annoyed after the birth all I wanted! I looked at the clock and did some calculations. I wanted to have a 7 hour or less labor. Labor really started at 6:00 a.m., so that meant 1:00 p.m. would be 7 hours. It was almost 10:15 a.m. so I really could be there for 2.5 more hours.
We had been there about 30 minutes. My contractions were strong. Spencer was to the left of me, not sure what he was doing, and my mom was down at my feet, massaging my legs. I was going through these big contractions and really breathing those contractions down, making them work for me, when all of a sudden…GUSH, my water broke and came flooding out! Both Spencer and my mom jumped out of the way, very surprised. It gave me a good chuckle! I didn’t know that was going to happen, but it was amusing to see them jump out of the way so they didn’t get it on them. We called the nurse in there to let her know and help get new sheets under me. I wanted her to check me soon after that, so like 45 minutes after we had been there and checked at a 7. I felt like I should have progressed more with these strong contractions. I was at an 8, but still only 85% effaced. My mom was asking me if I was wanting to push, because my body was wanting to a little she could see when I was going through the contractions. I nodded yes, a little. The nurse told me not to push yet, to try and calm my body so I didn’t push. She said I was not thinned out all the way and my body was not physically ready to push yet, the baby couldn’t get out yet. Man, that was hard to hear at that point! It made me a tiny bit nervous, worried that I was going to get stuck and not progress and it would go on for a couple more hours. The nurse left and I was focusing on breathing the baby down. I remembered something from my Hypnobirthing class that the teacher told us, in my own words, “Use the contractions to help, that’s what they are there for. They are necessary to get your baby down and out. When your body is contracting is when your body is trying to move the baby, so breath the baby down through them. Take deep breaths to push out your stomach to give your baby room to shift itself down.” Information like that. So instead of just making it through the contractions I really focused on using them to keep things progressing. It seemed to help the contractions not be so bad because I was thinking of something else now, rather than just how hard they are. Labor is SO hard! It really is. It is not SO painful, but really tough on the woman’s body, really hard work to get these sweet little babies here! The other thing that kept going through my mind through labor, helping me be strong and cope was an affirmation from the Hypnobirthing CD, “My body and my baby will work together in harmony for a smooth, easy birth.” I know that is true. I know that my body and baby have to work together. I know that I can control a small part of my body to help, to keep it relaxed so it can do its thing. So, I had been there for 1 hour now. It was around 10:45 a.m. My mom suggested that I turn on my side, since that seemed to be the key in helping my labor progress with Allstar. After a couple minutes and contractions I finally decided to do it. I kept having very strong contractions. I was really trying to think back to the end of labor with Allstar, trying to remember what it felt like, trying to think of I was at the end. My body sure felt like it was and I really believed I was. With each contraction I would kind of grunt, as my body was pushing a little at the end of each one. My mom kept saying “breath the baby down, breath, relax.” While it was helpful to keep hearing that, it was sort of annoying too, I wanted it quiet. It’s ok, I was almost done. After 30 minutes, and some huge contractions I felt it. The baby’s head starting to sting. I knew it was time, I knew I could start pushing, because the baby was coming now!!! My mom asked me if I wanted to push and I nodded a definite yes. She mentioned it to a nurse there, but they didn’t really believe it. They didn’t come over yet. I was raising my leg a little, giving me some room. The nurse checked me while on my side and said that yes, I was fully dilated and effaced and I could push when I wanted to! I shifted onto my back and spread wide open, I was going to push whether they were ready or not! I could feel the sting of my baby. I was fully aware of what was going on. I wanted Spencer to catch the baby if he wanted to and I wanted my mom to video and take pictures. I turned to Spencer and told him to go get ready if he wanted to. He was very hesitant to leave my side, wanting to help me be strong. I told him I was just fine and I wanted him to go catch the baby if he still felt comfortable with it. He left. I told my mom to go and get the camera and start the video. She did so. I was there, by myself to finish these contractions. I had to be strong for just a couple more minutes. I just had to get the baby’s head out and the body will just come out and labor will be over. The nurse said she could see the baby’s head. They were not ready for me to have this baby yet. I had gone so fast they didn’t get ready, so everyone was scrambling. The doctor was suiting up in her waterproof gear and mask! The nurses were getting the last minute prep. Spencer was trying to get ready. SPENCER WRITING: I’m frantically looking around, trying to find something to put on. I see the doctor putting on her waterproof gear and wondered “do I need that? Where is my stuff?” So of course all of the nurses were scrambling, none of them were able to help me, or get something for me to wear. So I looked in the cabinet to see what I could find. I saw the gown the patients wear, that Melina was wearing, so I grabbed that and as I was putting that on a nurse sees me and says “Oh, you don’t wear that, here put this on.” I grabbed it and put it on over the gown, I didn’t have time to take it off! It was the same kind of green shirt thing the doctor was wearing. This is all I got though, I didn’t get the mask, and booties for my shoes, just the shirt and gloves. I was wearing my old shoes that could get “yucky” doctor Smith had warned, since stuff tends to fall and splash on them! I could see the baby’s head crowning, I was right there with the doctor. I was very nervous to do this and wanted to back out and just let the doctor do this. She was really good, encouraging me. She started explaining to me that when I see the shoulder that I needed to turn the head and shoulder to a certain angle. I said, no, you do it! She did it, but kept me there to do the rest. MELINA BACK TO WRITING: They told me the baby was crowning and to push. The stinging was very strong, I just needed to get the baby’s head out. I think I was thinking to myself, hurry, get the head out, which was the most uncomfortable part. I pushed one last time and heard praises and that the baby’s head was out. I heard Spencer say that he couldn’t do it, and that the doctor should just do it. She was really great, telling him he can do this. She was redeeming herself for making me have pitocin I thought. She places Spencer’s hands underneath the baby’s head ready for the body to come out. The nurse told me to push 1 last time to get the body out. I had kind of forgotten that I need to still push. I did one last time and felt the baby’s body come out and felt that emptiness, that the birthing was done! I had did it again! Spencer’s hands were there, holding the baby’s head and back as it came out. He held it in his hands, and couldn’t put the baby on my stomach because the umbilical cord was not very long. He then made the announcement “IT’S A…..…ALLSTAR…..…HAS A BABY SISTER!!! IT’S A GIRL!!!” My eyes were still closed, from the concentrating. I realized I could open them now, I could see my baby! When Spencer was telling me what we had there was a pause after he said Allstar enough for me to think that it was a boy. That he was saying it’s a boy like Allstar. Then he said “has a baby sister.” A Girl! I couldn’t believe it, I really couldn’t. I was really thinking it was a boy, I was not prepared to have a girl! I patiently waited a couple minutes to hold her. We wanted to wait a couple minutes to cut the umbilical cord, wait until it stopped pulsating. They finally did that and handed the baby right to me. They did not wipe the baby off at all, like they did Allstar. I was SO happy about that. I held my sweet baby girl. Again, I could not believe it, my little angel! Then, I saw all her dark hair! Wow. This little baby was not only a girl but she had lot’s of dark hair! It was very unexpected. But I remembered my thoughts earlier that if it was a girl I pictured her having brown hair like her daddy. I held her and cuddled her, trying to keep her warm. The doctor told me to push one last time to get the placenta out. I just wanted to hold my baby! But I did what she said, and it came right out. Spencer thought it was very gross looking. She told me she was just going to put a couple stitches in me just to be sure. I only had a tiny tear. The nurses took the baby’s temperature and cleaned things up down there. Spencer came up by me and we just gazed at our baby girl. My mom took some pictures of us and everything going on. She weighed in at 7 lbs. 1 oz. and 19 ½ inches long. I was a bit surprised to hear 7 lbs rather than the 6 lb range. It was a little after Noon. I did it! I actually labored 1 hour shorter than my goal! I was expecting the nurses to come in at any moment to move us rooms, but they didn’t come. We just got to hang out in that room for a couple hours. It was nice to relax like that for a couple hours, soaking up all that just happened, rather than rush to be moved out. Later we found out why. They had just had 8 births that morning, their busiest ever. The delivery room I was in wasn’t even their normal delivery room, it was their overflow ones. The bed I was in did not come apart like normal beds, it just slanted down a little. I was so proud of myself. I am proud to say that I checked into the hospital after all the other women then gave birth before all the 7 women who gave birth that same day! I labored for 4 hours at home and only 2 hours at the hospital! As they moved us to our patient room we passed a girl who was in labor still, the same girl we passed as we checked into the hospital! Yea, I felt great!
